A New Year

Well, it's 2011. I spend the first five minutes of this year worshiping the God who is stronger than anything, I'd say that's a good start to the year :)

I have a lot I want to talk about in here. Basically, the last days of 2010 were hard, 2010 was a hard year. And January 1 that's all I could think about. It didn't help that my best friend and I had (and fixed) one of our bad fights a few days before the new year.

On January 1, she mentioned how whenever she said lovey-dovey stuff about her boyfriend, I'd say it was disturbing or gross, even though it wasn't. I explained why to her. She understood but then she said this,
"I've wanted to thank you for a while and I feel this is the time. Thank you for suggesting to strengthen mine and his bond. They've helped more than you can think :) he now trusts me 100% and I trust him 99%. Compared to 95% and 91% before. So thank you, I don't know where we'd be without you :) "

I denyed I helped. I can't believe I did. All the years I'd fail to help people, all the years people ignored, all the years I was called names... they came back to me. They told me I could never help ever. I hadn't helped them, it wasn't possible, I didn't know what I was doing, after all what did I know about relationships? I haven't had a boyfriend or even my first kiss. That is exactly what I told my best friend. She told me this:

"I thank you for being sane and thinking things thru while we were fighting and on top of that you came up with a way for us to fight less that actually worked. We knew we had to trust each other more, but we didn't know how. Until your ideas .... We haven't had a huge long fight in a long time. We have fought a little but we solved it alot quicker than we would've before. and things I would've taken off in rage about, I understand. All of this happened because of your help. That's why I thank you."

Once again I couldn't believe it, I denyed it with everything I had. I reminded her of all the people I couldn't help. And how just a few days ago, we had had a fight because I hadn't helped her when she needed me. She told me this,

"You are making me sad. You help. And you know I only said that out of confusion and frustration. things could be much worse if you didn't help... there could be no Zac, and no Peyton, there could be no Alena at our table. I know you helped that girl in your study hall too. And the rest of that is in the past. Look at now look at all the things that are now that happened because of your help, without your need to help there wouldn't be a me and Treiton. It'd be me or Treiton... not together.. or maybe not even a me... but because of you I'm here. And we are together. Because you DID help. Because you DO help. Because you are Kerri. My caring best friend. The girl that people ignore that does more good than any dressed up super hero. That will one day be more than she thinks she can be."

I don't tell you this to feel good about myself. I tell you this to show you something that scared me. My best friend is alive because of me. So many people would be so much worse, but apparently I stepped in. And you know what I thought? It's not me. It's God. He put me in the midst of all these hurting people. He lets me hear them out, when no one else does. One person can make a difference, one person can save a life, one person can reach out, one person can heal pain, one person can fix a broken heart, one person can fix a failing relationship, one life can change the world, I can only do it because of God's help. I'm on my way to changing the world, helping and it starts now, in 2011. Will you join me?