American Idols, God's Timing and TWIRP

Wednesday's are my favorite day of the week. Why? Youth service. A lot of my friends think I'm so glad to go to church because I get to see a friend of mine I don't see anywhere else. But that's not entierly why I like it so much, it's not even close. The real reason, I get so much closer to God. This week was no exception.

We sang You Won't Relent during worship, it was a song I needed to hear, it opened my heart to what was in store next. Soon, we started singing the part "Come by the fire inside of me, come be the flame on my heart." That part almost made me cry, it's what I needed, I needed God to come consume me with His fire once again, after the devil and myself had turned it to barely alive embers. We also sang Hosanna, that song gave me the most amazing feeling, and then The More I Seek You, I want to be that song so much!

Our pastor started his lesson, the third part in our American Idols series. It was about King Saul and how he wasn't patient on God, and instead had the mentality most Americans have: We need it now!

Stressful Situations

Selfish Impatience

and Sinful Defiance

were three key points. Every single one of them pointed an arrow straight to me... stressful situations- me, my best friend, show choir, grades, family. Selfish Impatience - I forgot about God last weekend, due to my selfish want to have everything better, I completly forgot that God was still there.
Sinful Defiance - I wanted to end my life this weekend, I didn't, certain people stopped me. But I acted in sinful defiance, as if God was not there or I no longer cared about Him. There are three scrapes on my wrist that will, as long as they last, remind never to forget about God. God caught me in His grace this weekend, I have this second chance and I'm going to use it.

Our pastor also talked a lot about God's timing, that part of the sermon couldn't come at a better time. There's this dance coming up in about a month at school, it's called TWIRP, the girls ask the guys. Some of my friends refuse to go, others have dates, and some others are telling me to ask someone to go. I've thought about it a lot, but what I didn't do was pray about it. I'm going to a lot, I'm just pretty sure God doesn't want me to ask my best guy friend to a school dance. Especially since He basically told me to not date until a while.

And, I'm not exactly sure the guy would say yes, after all he'd feel pretty strange being an eighth grader among high schoolers. So for now, I'll be content with the way he makes me laugh, how he makes me smile when I didn't think I'd smile, and be happy he always reminds me that God is there. God used him to save my life, maybe, just maybe, one day, in God's timing, we'll be more then friends.